Illustration by Rob Cham
Wow, it’s already 2013 in a few hours. And I thought I’m gonna wake up it’s the new year already… Been catching up with some zzzz, trying to fix my body clock, when obviously I can’t. Anyway. I’ll keep this new year message short and sweet. (I was too tired last Christmas to even drop a line, sorry guys)
Anyway, the first half of my 2012 was just simple. Starting out in a start up company with friends, taking a couple of projects left and right, and taking whatever I could take just to add up to what would be my measly income. I am happy the way it was. Its simplicity, its just being right and ample. Still got some time to blog… Most of my fond memories, I think, this year would be at the first half of the year.
Fast forward to the second half. Projects doubled, so as what I’m earning. Switched to freelance, and now I’m maintaining a number of clients. I kinda lost time for my blog. And I kinda miss it. I think I kinda dedicated a blog post for that. Though I’m starting out another one with a few friends. And for myself as well. I couldn’t place my schedule well in most times. A day, with its 24 hours couldn’t be just enough. Oh, let’s not forget I got my heart broken twice this year. In a row. In the second half. And that was a whammy. I think I kinda self-destructed a number if times. I’m not even gonna hide it… Went to my friends’ place drunk, smoked up, and just wasted. There were times that I just wouldn’t go home, and I was tempted to stay at the streets, walking, just to think and clear my mind.
I just wanted to go away. Always to go away. Escape the city for a couple of days only to find myself wanting to go away again the moment I arrive the city. I’m always tired and hungry for sleep, and I am hating sleep already ’cause it’s eating up all my time. I don’t wanna need rest. And it really feels like college only now, I can’t screw up.
I know I make it feel like I’m living the life here in my blog. I am though. I do live my life how I want it. My mistake though is that I forgot that I am not free to choose the consequences. If you ask me, I do not have a fucking idea how 2013 will be. I have plans, but I’d rather keep them to myself for now. It is yet again uncertainty that bothers me and at the same time excites the whole of me. It is, however, adult life which makes it all dark and twisted, and God knows, depressing.
2012 is a wildcard. But I am thankful to everything that happened with people I met, people I’ve worked with, been working with, people who believed in me, people who saw my potential, people who took the high road and became patient with me, people who were there when I was at my lowest, people who never left me. People who I will be spending 2013 with. Bottomline is we couldn’t have done all these, these capsule of memory we would now call 2012, without the ups and downs. So to that we raise our glasses, and puff our smokes. Cheers, 2012. And hello, 2013!!!
And let’s give back to God all the glory for a whirlwind rollercoaster ride that is 2012.
Here’s to another rollercoaster ride,